As I mentioned in an earlier post, I was set on reading Sex at Dawn in response to conversations regarding polyamory, monogamy and the true nature of human sexuality. Admittedly, I read the book with some trepidation since the quotes and references to the book depicted it as opposing mono relationships. With that said, I made it my goal to approach the authors' evidence with as open a mind as I could. And, there is a lot in this book. Covering human evolutionary biology from the dawn of man to today is no simple task. One big positive the book has overall is the level at which it is written. The authors do a very good job of bringing the science to be easily understood by a layperson. (Confession: I am admittedly not a science person so, that was really nice for me.) With all the information covered in the book, I'm dividing my take on it to match the book's divisions.
Right from the beginning, in the book's introduction, Ryan and Jetha present monogamous relationships as a problem. "There's good reason marriage is often depicted and mourned as the beginning of the end of a man's sexual life." Unfortunately, the authors leave us waiting for any evidence to back up this assertion. Further in the introduction, they ask "Why does the passion fade from so many marriages so quickly?" This, a worthy question, does deserve exploration and their questioning tone gave me hope. It is relevant and valuable to question the traditional models and what may be considered universals. And, I heartily agree with the assertion that we need a "new understanding of ourselves...based on a bold and unashamed assessment of the plentiful scientific data".
Many authors have posited, as Ryan and Jetha do, that our culture lost much that defined it in the shift from a hunter/gatherer society to structured agriculture. Communities undoubtedly became much smaller and played less of a role in culture, as individual family units gained predominance. The group lifestyle that hunter/gatherer cultures were based on emphasized interdependence for the survival of the group as a whole. The authors connect that social structure with sexuality, a link that I'll address in a later post. Certainly large family groups for food production and child-rearing would have made a great deal of sense. Drawing on evidence from current hunter/gatherer societies, they point to the idea of fierce egalitarianism as a cultural practice of mandatory sharing. "We believe this sharing behavior extended to sex as well." Thus far in the book, the authors have not demonstrated evidence of this assertion, a thing they promise to do in following sections.
Part I opens with a discussion of the cultural indoctrination that forms such visceral responses as disgust to certain types of food regularly eaten in other parts of the world. This makes sense and is fairly common knowledge. Much of what receives cultural acceptance and the label "normal" gets that approval because generations have touted it as positive. Ryan and Jetha propose that biological truth should be separated from cultural influence and, again, I cannot disagree with that. Being able to distinguish between these two concepts has advanced culture in the western world in human rights, technology and social structure, giving rise to equal rights to vote, hold property, developments in hygiene and communication as well as public education and upward mobility. I grew wary at this point in the book, however, seeing the authors' direction toward more denigration of monogamy.
I have seen many references to our close primate relatives, the bonobos, in recent years. Their open and varied sexual practices have been publicized and studied often in the last decade or so. When the authors begin turning to examining the mating habits of several primates, they establish that the only monogamous ape is the gibbon, a primate that establishes long-term pair bonds. The gibbons create a model akin to the nuclear family unit common to many families. Bonobos, on the other hand, exhibit closely connected family groups that are comprised of a community of primates and exhibit non-monogamous sexual relationships. Sex among bonobos exists for pleasure as well as procreation--another difference between them and the gibbons. Clearly, the social structure and sexuality they exhibit matches more closely a polyamorous/non-monogamous familial organization.
As Ryan and Jetha draw Part I of the book to a close, they include a table that delineates the socio-sexual behavior and infant development of chimps, bonobos and humans. Listing such similarities between humans and bonobos as: female copulation during menstruation, the rate at which infants develop, behavior of females after giving birth, variety of copulatory positions, behavior while having sex and variation of sexual partner combinations (hetero and homosexual), the authors are clearly laying the groundwork for further connection (either existing or repressed) between humans and bonobos.
